This commandment by Jesus creates so much confusion and hypocrisy as we try to obey it but can’t. I can’t say, think and imagine that I “love my enemy” but if I don’t feel it, I am caught on the hook of a double-bind. I must obey, I can’t obey…but I must…so what do I do. Well, I find a way to rationalized, to repress feeling, or split my mind so that I think one thing but do another. That is what’s called hypocrisy.
So what does “love” mean, first. Love isn’t an experience or a feeling. Love isn’t an emotion. Love is a way of being that hat no conflict. There is no rub in love. Love is unity.
OK, what does “enemy” mean. Enemy is a metaphor for Other. And that other can include my own thoughts. The Other creates the Rub. So if I’m caught on the hook of the double-bind where I must love to be a Christian, but I don’t feel love, I myself am now the Rub, the enemy.
So we can see the “love your enemy” really means love yourself. That’s where the rub begins. Now in relationship we create the rub when your opinion or position rubs with mine. We both want Unity, or the One that is not two, the One that has no rub. But we each through our opinion claim to be that ONE, the Love, and neither will give because each of us has invest our Identity in our opinion. I am my opinion, be feel. And if the other doesn’t accept or agree of affirm my opinion, there is the Rub, and I can’t obey that damned commandment: There must be One….
Now that ONE is also a metaphor. God is One. the Cosmos is One. Reality is One. This coffee cup is One. I am One. And yet, when we meet, you and I, there is Two. What is the ONE that is two?
This is why Satre, the existentialist said, “Hell is other people.” Relationship…everything is relationship. Nothing stands alone, so there is no One me, or One other, because we are all in relationship. The soup can (Andy Warhol) doesn’t stand alone in the universe…but I digress.
My right opinion depends upon your wrong opinion. That’s the way the game is played. My opinion is right because your opinion is wrong (don’t take this personally, please. I’m just working out this logic here, so walk with me).
In other words, I am ONE (as my opinion/position) as long as you are wrong, dismissed, put down, or eliminated. If I am not the ONE, then I’m disobeying the categorical imperatives that there must be One, and I’m IT. There can’t be Two Me’s. (did you see the Tom Cruise movie Oblivion?)
The Opinion War is really a cosmic battle to be the One that has no second. When we win the battle, we discover that it is, however, only a skirmish. The glory is always temporary. And we have to defend our Oneness again and again. When we can’t win through logic and persuasion, we resort to violence and in the end total destruction. “If I can’t be the One then nobody is the ONE…for that too is the ONE.”
Winding back to where we started, love is a way of being that transcends the Rub, leaps beyond the war for the One. So what is the One in love?
The One is the Relationship. Remember, all is relationship. Nothing stands alone. Noah’s Art has pairs of everything, relationship. No animal stands alone. Male/female is relationship. Yin/yang. So where is the One…remember, there must be ONE…yet there is two or relationship…Ah…this is the cosmic Zen Koan.
The ONE is relationship, but this relationship is upstream of the TWO, Peace is upstream of the war. Peace, or the ONE must be discovered in the conflict of relationship.
In marriage, for instance, when both parts of the ONE remember that the Relationship is the ONE in which they are united, they rediscover their Oneness..the One that is Two..and the rub dissolves in embrace. The One is not a state of two objects—two things cannot be One thing—the One is Relationship, not a static relationship, but a dynamic relationship of constant discovery of unity in diversity.
This is important. Vital. Relationship is dynamic unity. If it is static unity it will be in conflict, each struggling to discovery the ONE without giving up their thingness.
When we can’t give up our thingness, we are locked in conflict with other things, for we must be ONE. But we are looking for the ONE is the wrong place.
We find the ONE in relationship when we relax our grip on the Oneness of our thingness or, in this case, our opinion. Our opinion is a metaphor or abstraction of our physical thingness, our desire to exist as a thing.
But we only exist as relationship, as the Two that is One. One..Two..which is it? The One is always upstream of the Two..a discovery and that discovery is Love. Love is a verb not a noun.
So right here on Facebook there is the rub of two Opinions vying to be the ONE. When I see that this rubbing with the “enemy” is like two sticks creating fire…the fire is the leap upstream of the Two to discover the ONE…so it is in this creative Idea that one discovers in the rub that is the ONE that includes the two, but not as holding two contradictory opinions together, allowing the other to be grudgingly, No…the single Idea is going to be creative, one that has never existed before, the ONE that resolves the rub, yet does not deny the other…
Actually, this long rant is an example of that, for this stream of writing is actually the discovery of a single Idea that takes us both to a discovered relationship instead of a rub.
“But I don’t have to love it just because I’m supposed to love you.”
You see that is what sticks in our craw. I rebel when I MUST love it. That’s like the parent shoveling broccoli down out throat. This is good for you, you must love it. MUST is the cue to rebel. MUST challenges and threatens my Oneness..and I must be One, you see.
There MUST be ONE. I must love the broccoli. My mother says I must, but I don’t feel it. This will stick in my craw for my whole life. Unless I rebel, I am not the ONE. If I comply, and love the broccoli, I am not the ONE, for the One is different than the parent.
In FB opinion wars, that broccoli comes up in our throats. You MUST accept my opinion, the Enemy says. You MUST like ME. We will be ONE if you love my opinion. You must be ME.
Ahah! There is it. Each of us is saying that we can both obey the commandment (there must be ONE) if you become ME…then we are the ONE that has no rub. And, this cannot happen because neither ONE cannot not be ONE.
Love is a creative act where the ONE remembers Relationship is the ONE, and relationship is a discovery that happens spontaneously when the ONE remembers that it is not the ONE…and. yet is Must be One….
Love is creating the ONE. LOVE is the creative force of the cosmos itself that is always creating the ONE out of Two.