I love koans. I see koans everywhere. Koans unlock the dilemmas of my everyday mind. Zen koans are spiritual irony; everyday koans are just irony. Koans are metaphors that point in opposite directions with contradictory commandments that are mutually exclusive yet mutually dependent at the same time. The koan is this and not this at the same time. Koans are double-binds where you are damned if you do and damned if you don’t. Koans are the paralysis of choice, the portal to creativity or violence, because one must get out of the Koan. Koans are the death of logical choice.

If you say the koan is logical, you are wrong; if you say the koan is illogical, you are wrong. Now which is it? You must choose or you will be smacked.